It's so easy to find yourself lost and paralyzed by the difficulty to write anything down. It's not just writer's block or a lack of creativity, but it's a function of the questions in your head: Is it worth writing down? Am I creating value? Is my voice worth hearing? Are my thoughts and opinions important?

This becomes more true in the light of even more serious hits in life. The last time I talked about this, it was a health problem that forced a reset. Now it's the medium term effects of the pandemic – the financial hit that we've taken having had a travel business that had income and credit lines dry up leading to liabilities we can't repay.

We had to give up some things, and we were forced to stare failure in the face. We had to ask for help after years of believing we've got everything we need to be independent. We had to give up living in our little piece of heaven.

It's hard.

Without wings I can feel free
Photo by Mohamed Nohassi / Unsplash

Perhaps the harder part was admitting that, some things really do happen for a reason. What had just transpired had been brought about by a misalignment of the things that my family and I wanted in our lives – but haven't necessarily been deliberate about.

Many people struggle with this – it's difficult being deliberate with your finances, it's difficult being deliberate about your health, it's difficult being deliberate about your career, and it's difficult being deliberate with your relationships.

But we need to be deliberate in our lives.

I have to be deliberate about writing, and so I write this down. Even if it had been months, even if there's no one reading – I do it because I know there are good things in store for those who are deliberate.

So yet again, we rebuild.